Archive for christians say the darndest things

Conservatives – You’ve been pimped and I have the proof!

So, I’ve thought for a while that the Republican party has been pimping Christians for their votes for a while now. “Vote for me, I believe like you. I believe the bible is God’s word like you…’ yadayadayada…

It always looked like I was being told whatever I wanted to hear to win my vote. Being a salesman, I know when I’m being sold something that’s not as advertised.

Well, President G. W. Bush was recently interviewed on ABC and revealed that he may not necessarily believe like you.

Here is David Brody, correspondent for Christian Broadcast Network’s take on it.

You might want to keep this kind of stuff in mind when we talk about “putting God’s man in office.” If this kind of stuff influenced your vote – unfortunately, you’ve been pimped.

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New Segment – Christians Say the Darndest Things

Well, I figured after I heard this one – along with the SCORES of other crazy things I’ve heard Christians say – I figured I’d add a new segment to the blog. Its a segment called “Christians Say The Darnedest Things.” Its a segment where I highlight some of the foolery some preacher has said about culture from the Bible.

For the innitiation of this segment, I’d like to highlight something I heard this weekend from a preacher on Christian talk radio (a well spring of inspiration for this segment can come from there). Since we were approaching the “pagan” celebration of Halloween (check out Mike Servello’s post on that, FANTASTIC!), the preacher took some liberties and began to preach about it in a way that would make American Christians want to reject the celebration of Halloween and not participate. So how does he do that? With the Bible? NO! He does it by equating Halloween with something NO good Christian, and probably registered Republican, would want to EVER be associated with – Muslim Jihad!

WHAT?!?!?! That’s right folks, according to this guy on the radio, Halloween is the equivalent to Jihad! “How” you ask? Because Halloween and Jihad have a fixation with death, so the two are equals. And if anyone participates in the celebration of Halloween, then they ALSO participate in Jihad. And we all know Jesus doesn’t like Jihad. So not only is Halloween anti-Christian, its also anti-American because no self respecting American should want to be apart of Jihad.

So folks, if your kid dressed up as Buzz Lightyear and went door to door to get candy and other childlike pleasantries, you are particpating in Jihad, the destruction of the West, the destruction of Israel and converted to Islam.

I won’t even justify this by getting all scriptural. This doesn’t even require turning to the pages of the sacred texts to know that somebody has been sipping from the chalace of stupidity! Halloween and Jihad? Give me a massive break! The practice of Halloween wasn’t even started by anyone who believes in Allah! Cue the music – “duumb da-dumb-dumb, duumb da-dumb-dumb-duuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuumb!”

Halloween is like Jihad, Christians say the darndest things…